Bro is 1!

Dear Bro,

I sit here nursing you tonight and wonder how a year can pass so quickly.  I remember the moments leading up to your birth with so much clarity, then remember seeing you for a moment and having you wisked away from me, finally getting to my room and waiting, waiting and waiting to hold you.  After your sister's were born I had them with me.  I had to wait, an agonizing wait, for you.  Six hours after you were born I was able to hold you.  My sweet baby boy.  Before you were born I didn't know what I would do with a boy, and once you got here I didn't ,and still don't,  know  what we would do without you. 

You were the smallest of my babies, weighing in at a mere 6 lbs and 5oz, but at 1 year you out weigh your sister's 1 year stats by at least 2 pounds. 

Weight:  Around 20lbs
Height:

• You wear a size 4 diaper.  Technically you can still wear a size 3 diaper, but K wears a 4, and it's easier if you guys have the same size ;)
• You have 6 teeth!  You have (MANY)  more teeth than either of your sister's did at this age.
• You wear size 12 month clothes.  18 month things are far to big, while most 9 month items are too small. 
• You are walking without any hesitation.  You took your first steps at 10 months, and can now run, climb and get anywhere you want to be.
• You are very verbal, and can say Mama, Dada, Dog, bark :). 
• You love to give kisses, but will only give them to girls or Cody!  Though I did see you give one to Daddy yesterday!
• You want to do everything your sister's do.  When they play out on the carport and I don't let you out with them, you get SO mad!
• You are all boy! You love to hammer, you love balls, you love when we roughhouse with you and you love cars.
• Some of your favorite foods are:  strawberries, blueberries, pasta, cherrio's, peanut butter crackers,  YoBaby Yogurt, chicken, rice.
• You are still nursing.
• I nurse you to sleep and then you sleep in a cosleeper until you get hungry and then you nurse.  I don't usually even wake up. 
• You have never taken a paci.
• You've never had a bottle. 
• You drink water out of a cup.
• You LOVE to take baths and take almost every bath with me.  At times you will take a bath with G&K, or a shower with Daddy.

Bro, my little hershey puff, the nickname given to you by G, there is so much I want to remember about your first year.  I wish I had documented each month, but life has been insanly busy and I've been so involved in living it that I haven't had time to write about it.  You are such an easy baby.  After your first few months of life and a few hospital visits and scares, you have been a healthy boy.  You don't cry much at all, and have an adorable smile and laugh. 

We all love you Hershey Puff, more than you will ever know. 

Bro is 5 Months!!!

Dear Bro,

Today you are 5 Months old! 

Weight:  16 lbs
Height:  24.5 inches

• You wear a size 3 diaper
• You wear size 6-9 month clothes
• You are a rolly polly little man and roll from your back to your stomach and your stomach to your back.  The only place we can leave you is on the floor, you move SO much!
• You creep along on your stomach, not what I would call a crawl yet, but you are definitely moving along on your tummy, powered by your little feet.
• You love to be in a standing position.  You stood holding onto your exersaucer just the other day, all by yourself, for over a minute!
• You coo and babble all the time.  You love to "talk", and you say "Ma", "Mamma" when you want me, you are the earliest of my babies to say Mama--you started this a full month ago!!!
• You play with lots of toys!  Some of your favorites include:  your blue O ball, your "taggie" blanket that your honorary "Aunt" P gave you, and anything else you can put into your mouth!
• You still don't really take a passy!  Sometimes you will take one, but you aren't a real passy baby.
• You have never had a bottle.
• You LOVE to nurse and would nurse all day long if I let you!  And I would let you, but with your 2 sisters around I have to put you down sometimes!

Fright Night & Our Gift

I'm not a Mom who lets things go.  I notice right away if one of my kids is feeling off and have a great relationship with the nurses at Dr. Mommy Love's office.  I call them with questions and concerns frequently and love knowing them all on a first name basis.  I also love that they know my children on a first name basis and love my  children.

Saturday night Bro wasn't feeling great.  He is 4 1/2 months old (yes I'm a bit late in posting his 4 month letter, I know) so he got some Tylenol, 1 ml of benadryl and a breathing treatment.  He wasn't even that wheezy.  But somehow I knew he needed it.

At 11pm he started gasping for air.  Not the type of gasping where I needed to put him in the bathroom with steam or open the freezer door.  The type of gasping where I put him in his car seat and raced to the ER.  I didn't even put on clothes.  I was in my jammies.    Just my nightgown.  There wasn't time.  Daddy P couldnt' come with me.  G & K were sleeping and instinctively I knew we couldn't wait for Grampy to get here.  I wasn't panicked, I wasn't thinking about what could happen, or what would happen, I was 100% focused on getting him to the hospital.

I walked into the ER doors, and quickly, but calmly, went to the check in desk.

"My baby is having trouble breathing"

I didn't have to check in, didn't have to fill out any paper work, nothing.  A nurse took Bro from my arms, and immediately took me to the back.  There were no private rooms, so we were put into room with 2 others, just a curtain separating the beds.  Things went quickly from there.  Bro went from bad to worse.  He was given oral steroids and 2 special breathing treatments.  We were never left alone.  There was always a nurse, respiratory therapist or Doctor (and frequently all 3) with us. 

I don't remember a lot from my time working with medically fragile children, but I do know that a reading of 48 on a pulse ox machine is not good.  Bro's feet turned purple.  Daddy P got there and had to hold Bro.  I still wasn't grasping the severity of the situation.  Just breathing to get through each minute.  At first we were told we would be there for 3-4 hours, then we were going to be admitted, and then finally told we were going to be transferred to the Children's Hospital....over an hour away.  People say time stands still, but for me everything was going in fast forward. 

We made it to the Children's hospital in 45 minutes.  Daddy P driving behind us in the minivan, me in the ambulance with Bro.  At first we were going to wait for an ambulance from the Children's Hospital to come to us, but then the Drs decided there was no time, so off we went.  Sirens blaring & lights flashing.  I'm still amazed at how calm I was.

Bro received several more breathing treatments and oral medications was able to be taken off the oxygen he was on and admitted to the hospital. 

He's still not himself, but he's home, with us.

Now, that's it's night, that everyone here is sleeping, it's hitting me.  People don't go to the ER expecting their child to die, but it happens.  Our situation could have very easily gone the other way.  Bro could have died.  I've read blogs where that has happened.  In hind sight I can see that even the Doctor's, nurses and RT's were worried.  They NEVER left us.

Life is a precious gift.  After a week filled with tantrums--by both the girls AND Mommy, I was given a reminder of just how precious it is.

Bro is 3 Months Old!!!

Dear Bro,
Today you are 3 months old.  It's amazing how fast the past 3 months have gone.  Before you were born, even before we knew you were a boy I was frightened of the prospect of a son.  I didn't know what I would do with a boy.  I thought having a boy would rock my world.  And it has, but in a very good way!!!  I am in love with you in a way I never imagined.  From your emergency entry into this world, to your hospital visits, to your little smiles, the sweet way you coo and "talk" to us, to the way you follow me with your entire body when someone else is holding you, every little thing you do makes me fall more in love with you.  I recently read an article about first time mothers and one thing that stuck home to me was the statement "we are all first time Moms, even with our 2nd, 3rd 4th children"  You are my 3rd child, but I am a first time Mommy of 3& a first time Mommy of a boy.  Though I've experienced many things before, it's my first time to experience them with you and they are all special and memorable!

To me 3 months marks the end of the newborn stage.  I've tried to taken in every little moment with you, because most likely I will not hold another newborn that grew inside me.  I won't be up late at night nursing a teeny little baby, nor will I change another teeny little diaper.  While this does make me sad, I look forward to all the things I have yet to experience as a mother!

3 Month Stats:

Weight:  14.6 lbs!!!  My biggest baby by far at this stage!!! (And you have already doubled your birth weight)
Height:

• You are wearing size 2 diapers!  We still have 1-2's left, but they are far too small for you!  Daddy put a size 4 diaper on you (one of  K's) by accident, and though it was big on you, it wasn't HUGE!
• You are wearing  a few size 3 month items, and a mixture of 3-6 months and 6-9 month clothing.  I just did a load of 9 month clothes to have in your drawer for when we need them.
• You sleep from 9 or 9:30 pm to at least 5 am, sometimes longer.
• You roll from your tummy to your back and from your back to your tummy (though I've never seen you roll from your back to your tummy, you do it every night in your sleep!)
• You have yet to even try a bottle.  They are all packed up.
• You will take a paci for very short amounts of time, though your sisters, especially K, try to put one in your mouth.
• You love to lay on your play mat and play with "Mr. Octopus"
• You want to stand.  If someone is holding you, you try to stay in a standing position.  You can bear weight on your legs. 
• We've tried you in the exersaucer for small amounts of time and you LOVE it.
• You are smothered covered with kisses and love from G & K.  They love you, they love to hold you, they love the change you, they love everything about you!
• You have reflux, but most of the time it doesn't hurt you.  You just spit up a lot!  Grampy even keeps an extra church shirt in his car!
• You are still a super nurser!  Your favorite position to be nursed is in the side lying position. 
• Everywhere you go with your Daddy people say you are a little version of him!  You have his long eyelashes, just like your sisters!

Bro: 10 Weeks Old

Dear Bro,

Your last update was when you turned 1 month old; I had planned on updating again when you were 2 Months old, but you really rocked my world between weeks 6-8 and I'm just getting back to normal now! 

At your 2 Month 10 week well baby visit your stats were:

Weight:  12lbs 60z
Height:  21.5 inches

You are doing all sorts of amazing things!

• You are wearing size 1, 1-2 & 2 diapers.  I have a mixture of these diaper sizes.  We are finishing up the Size 1's and once they are gone we won't buy anymore!  The size we use most are Size 1-2's, and Grammy & Grampy have size 2's at their house, so when you need a diaper change there that's what you get :)
• You are wearing size 0-3 & 3-6 Month clothing. 
• You are laughing, smiling & cooing at all sort of things now!  I love to see how alert you are when you are awake!
• You don't like to be on your tummy and when I put you on it you simply roll to your back~you've been doing this for a while, but now you do it the instant I put you on your tummy!
• You LOVE your sisters.  You stare at them, laugh at them and let them hold you and cover you with kisses without so much as a bit of a protest.
• You are a Mommy's boy and want to be held by ME almost all the time.  I happily oblige you, and hand you over to your "real" Mommy, G, when she asks ;)
• You spit up ALOT, but are growing like a champ, so we're not bothered by it~I just make sure to have something close by me at all times!
• You LOVE to take baths and take one with me almost every night....some nights (whenever they see you in the tub with me) your sisters jump in too.  You laugh and coo in the tub!
• You still haven't had a bottle and refuse to take a pacifier.
• You are sleeping in a co-sleeper right next to me.
• You are the spitting image of your Daddy!

Bro, I love you more than I ever could have imagined.  You are the BEST baby.  The only time you cry is when you are hungry, wet/dirty or have been hurt.  You are content to sit in your swing, lay on the floor, but are happiest when being held by Mommy.  I love to sit and hold you and breath you in.  You are growing SO fast and I want to etch every moment into my memory!

Bro: Weeks 4-8

Daddy P went back to work on 5/18.  I had been dreading him going back to work the entire 6 weeks week leading up to it.  It was SO much worse than I could have imagined.

The morning Daddy P went back to work G, K & I all woke up with a fever.  The girls were listless and sleepy and I had a horrible sore throat, headache, etc.  Bro was fine (at that minute)  Grampy & I took the kids in to the ped (of course Dr. Mommy Love wasn't there that day so we saw a different, not so Mommy Love Dr....and got a dx of nothing.

Friday, 5/20, Bro woke up with a temp.  It was "only" 100, but in a 6 week old, 100 isn't good.  Back to the ped we went.  Instead of seeing Dr. Mommy Love (who I thought we were seeing) we saw Nurse Practitioner Mommy HATES, LOATHES & DESPISES.  It was not a good visit, and we were sent home around 3pm with instructions to give antibiotics, Tylenol.  I, who at this point was close to tears, called Dr. Mommy Love (4pm), and we agreed to wait to start the antibiotics.  Daddy P got back from his first 3 days of work at 5:30pm, and by 7pm we knew Bro was not ok.  He was listless, moaning in his sleep and not eating.  After a quick call to Dr. Mommy Love (one of the many reasons I LOVE her is bc I can call her at home), she admitted us to the hospital.  We went straight to the peds floor and were put right into a room. 

The next hours were awful.  Bro was very dehydrated, and it took way too many tries to get an IV in.  Finally someone from the NICU got it, but it was after my sweet boy had been poked and poked and poked some more.  I couldn't take it and finally had to leave the procedure room.  (he also had a lot more things done at the same time)  When Daddy P brought him back there were even tears in his eyes :(

Daddy P left the hospital around 12 to go to our sweet girls, both sick, at Grammy & Grampy's.  At 1am I was told Bro needed a spinal tap.  At 2 am he had it...I couldn't go with him, but he was back in my arms by 2:45.  I was up and at 4am got a call from Daddy P saying K's temp was 103.7 in her armpit.  Grammy & Grampy gave her a bath & Tylenol while Daddy P went home to get our thermometer. 

It was a long, emotionally & physically exhausting weekend.  Bro was discharged from the hospital on Sunday and Daddy P went back to work on Monday.

Bro was still very sleepy and not acting like himself when he got home, but he was on antibiotics and we didn't expect him to go back to 100% right away.  Flash forward to Wednesday...just 1 week from when Daddy P first went back to work.  Bro had gone in for a chest x-ray in the am (a little cloudy, but ok), but was very, very sleepy and not having a lot of wet diapers.  I was checking in with Dr. Mommy Love, and around 12;45pm we spoke.  At 3pm I noticed Bro's soft spot looked a bit swollen.  I tried not to panic, with very little success, and called a good friend who's husband is an ER Doc.  While on the phone with her I broke down and cried and cried.  I just knew he was not ok.  His soft spot was bulging out and getting bigger and bigger.

Dr. Mommy Love was out of the office, so we saw another Ped, Dr. Softspoken.  I like him almost as well as Dr. Mommy Love.  He sent us back to the hospital, this time to the PICU. 

***Will be back later to continue....

Happy Mother's Day: My Gift!!!

To me Mother's Day is everyday.  Granted I don't appreciated every day like I should, anywhere near like I should, but I have the things in life that I need and want. 

I am married to a man, the super Daddy P, who is in full agreement with my desire to be a Stay At Home Mom (SAHM).  We don't exchange gifts on any holiday or birthday, there's just no budget for it, but I remind him often that my gift is being a SAHM.  Instead of dropping my children off somewhere each morning I get to be at home with them pretty much all day, every day, and while there ARE moments during each day that I would love to run off and escape somewhere, I truly view each day as my Mother's Day (Birthday/Anniversary/Christmas) gift.  My children are only going to be babies, toddlers & preschoolers once.  There is no place I would rather be than at home raising them myself.  I'm already seeing how quickly time passes. 

Much to my unease G is starting preschool 3 half days a week in the fall.  The fall, and I am already staying up at night stressing over this.  For her entire life she's been with me, and the few times I've been away she's been in the care of Daddy P or Grammy & Grampy.  Starting in August I will have to drop her off to be in the care of someone else for 4 hours a day.  Some Mother's may relish this time, and I may grow to, but for now I can't imagine what it will be like not to have her with me.  I don't want to hold her back, and am thankful she will be in a school that Grammy & Grampy are very involved in and that is a very short distance from our home, BUT I am dreading the day that I take her there and leave her and drive away with K & Bro.  I know that all too soon they will be doing the same and I will be back in the world of the working, looking back at my days of being a SAHM with looonging.

When I first became a Mother I told a friend I had found the job I was born to do.  She, another SAHM, said she felt the same way.  It's the only way I can describe it to people.  The second G was born I knew that being a SAHM was the best job in the world for me and what I had waited for my entire life.

So today, the official day of recognition for Mother's everywhere, I celebrate my journey in Motherhood.  Yes there are times I wish I had a lunch break or the ability to run out for anything, but those are the minority, minutes or seconds of my life, and aren't what my days are made of.

Thanks to Daddy P for giving me a gift, well 3 gifts ;),  I get to enjoy every single day of my life, I don't know what I'd do without a hubby like you!

1 Month Old

Dear Bro,

Today you are officially 1 Month Old, Happy Birthday little man!  In your 1 month on earth you've officially won the hearts of so many people, the main ones being me, Daddy P, G & K.  Grammy & Grampy also fell immediately in love with you!  G & K still smother you with kisses, sometimes in the literal sense and we've started to pull them off of you.  You've brought so much joy to our life in the short time you've been here and I can't wait to see the little boy, young man and adult you grow up to be!

1 Month Stats & Info

Weight:  9lbs 3oz!!! (Edit on 5/13/11 you weigh 10lbs 2oz--gained 1 lb in 8 days!!!)

• You are now in Size 1 diapers
• You still wear NB clothing, but it is getting tight!  Size 0-3 Months is huge on you, but we put you in it sometimes!
• You are spitting up a lot, but growing well!
• You rarely cry...if you do it is because you are hungry or have a dirty diaper
• Your eyes are still blue!  I'm wondering if they are going to stay that way.
• You sleep for 2 hours in the morning and 4 hours in the afternoon.  You sleep in 4 hour stretches during the night.  I still put you on the angel monitor, but you'd rather be in bed with me!
• When you are awake you just sit and take the world in with your eyes wide open.
• You love to be skin to skin with me.
• You love your evening bath...even though it's with your sisters & I every night ;)
• You love to nurse and are a super nurser!

G & Bro

Tonight while G was supposed to be trying to sleep & bro was sleeping in his portable bassinette Daddy P & I heard the Angel Monitor go off.  The Angel Monitor alerts us if more than 20 seconds go by without any movement--him breathing--

We are at Grammy & Grampy's house, taking care of Maggie while they are on vacation.

Daddy P got there before me, since he was closer, and found G, sitting in the middle of Grampy & Grammy's bed with Bro on her lap.  At first he though I left Bro on the bed.  Then I got in the room and asked how Bro got into G's arms in the middle of the bed.

Bro never cried.  The only thing that alerted Daddy P or I that he was out of his bed was the beeping of the Angel Monitor.

G refused to tell us how she picked him up.  It must have been pretty gentle since he didn't cry, but we are left wondering...

3 Weeks Old

3 weeks ago at this time Daddy P and I were in the car, driving to the hospital.  I was having contractions every 4-6 minutes and thinking how I never thought we would experience a ride like that.  With both the girls I was sent to the hosptial from Dr. Love's office.  It's hard to believe bro's due date just passed.  He was due 4/22 and born at 37 weeks. 

Bro is such an easy going baby.   He gets smothered in kisses by his sisters.  G knows to be gentle, and K is learning, but he just lays there while every inch of exposed skin gets kissed.

Weight:  Not sure, but somewhere around 7 lbs or so.  He's really filling out!

•  He only cries when he is hungry or dirty.
• He passed his hearing test he had yesterday (after failing the newborn hearing test 3x in the hospital).  We go back in a month to check, but if he has any loss it's just a tiny bit in one ear.
• He is wearing newborn sized clothing & diapers....both are starting to fit better :)
• He is rolling from his tummy to his back every time I put him on his tummy.
• He is sleeping like a champ....but wakes up every 3-4 hours to eat at night.
• He LOVEs to nurse and has yet to have a bottle.
• He enjoys baths, and gets to be in the big tub with Mommy & his sisters when he has one.
• Just like his older sisters, we can't use wipes on him, only water & washcloths.

Having a son is amazing and I love every minute with him.  He loves to snuggle up with me, Daddy P, his sisters, and Grammy & Grampy (who he is named after).

2 Weeks Old!

Dear Brother,

Today you are 2 weeks old.  Already time is flying by and you are growing before our very eyes.  Two weeks ago tonight I was feeling what I thought might be contractions.  I wasn't quite sure, since I'd never gone into labor on my own before.  Your birth was nothing like any of us here planned, but it was perfect in that you were born healthy.  Your first 24 hours were scary.  Though you were able to stay in the room with Daddy & I, you were grunting & gasping with each breath and we were all worried you would have to go to the NICU.  Thankfully about 24-36 hours after you were born you started pinking up and and breathing like a champ. 

My love for you astounds me.  Before I was a Mother I never knew I could love someone so much.  Then G was born and I loved her like I never knew I could, then K was born and I was amazed again and now again for you my sweet little boy, my heart expands.  While Daddy P is home I'm spending as much time as I can holding you.  I hold you every minute possible and try to soak in every minute of the newborn you. 

2 Week Stats:

Weight:  6 lbs 14oz

• Newborn clothing is still big on you, and we've already gone through 2 boxes of NB diapers.
• You are spending more time awake & I love watching you watch the world around you.
• You are a very calm & quiet baby.  If you cry it's because you are hungry or have a dirty diaper....other than that it is rare to hear you crying.
• You are held by both your sisters over and over through out the day, and you quietly lay there while they cover you with kisses and fawn over every part of you!
• You make the sweetest little baby sounds while you sleep.
• You are still nursing like a champ and we both love it!
• You had your first bath on 4/19/11 and loved it!  You sat in my lap in the tub and just "soaked" it all in!  (You had your 2nd bath on 4/22/11 and your sisters got in too!  It was Mommy holding you with G on one side and K on the other!)

Brother is 1 Week Old!

1 Week Old

Today Bro is 1 week old!!! Wow! Time has flown by.

1 Week Stats/Info:

•You weigh 6lbs 4 oz

•You have had your bili levels tested the past 2 days and we are having to put you on a bili blanket to get rid of your jaundice.
•You wear a NB sized diaper, though it is huge on you
•You are eating every 3-4 hours and you are a CHAMPION nurser!
•Newborn clothes are HUGE on you,
•You are sleeping very well, but wake up every 3-4 hours to eat.
•You are sleeping in a co-sleeper in Mommy & Daddy's room.
•You have sprayed Daddy & Mommy many times!
•You are spending more and more time with your eyes open.
•Your umbillical cord stump fell off tonight (4-13-11)
You don't like paci's, which mystifies your sisters, who are always trying to put one in your mouth!

Brother's Birth Story

April 6, 2011

2:15 am

6lbs 5oz

Tuesday April 5

Daddy P called me to tell me he was on his way home from work and I asked him if he wanted to our favorite Mexican Restaurant to eat dinner since Tuesday night was kids eat free night. I was also secretly hoping the Mexican food would help put me into labor. We ordered our usual of Fajita’s Texana’s and a chicken soft taco with rice for the girls to split. While we were there I had several painful contractions, but didn’t think too much of them. I texted 2 friends to ask about how to time contractions , but didn’t really pay too much attention to actually timing them.

As we got into the car and were heading home I had a few more contractions, but still wasn’t thinking about the possibility that I was in labor. Once home I got right into a hot bath (a standard for me during my pregnancy) and after that immediately started cleaning & packing, knowing I had an appt with Dr. Love the next day and knowing there was the possibility that I wouldn’t come home. Daddy P was working on getting the girls to sleep and had started with K. I spoke with my bff several times, wondering if I actually might be going into labor, but the consensus was that I was having Braxton hicks. Daddy, having put K to sleep, kept saying we should either call Dr. Love or just go to the hospital (he mentioned that we should leave several times during the evening/night). By this point my contractions were about 10 minutes apart and were literally bringing me to my knees each time I had one.

I texted Dr. Love at 9:30 and he told me to start timing them , drink 20oz of water and to let him know if they were coming every 10 minutes or more. Daddy P decided to call Grampy and let him know that we were probably going to be heading to the hospital at some point that night. After texting Dr. Love and letting him know how close my contractions were he told us to head in to be checked. I had been telling Daddy P that we needed to wait and get G to sleep, but at around 10:30 I told him to call Grampy and tell him to come to our house. My system started to do a clean out while Grampy arrived and he and Daddy P carried our girls to his waiting car. I wish we had been able to get a picture of us before leaving for the hospital, but there was no time. After Grampy left with the girls Daddy P continued packing up the car and finally got me into it and we headed to the hospital.

The ride to the hospital took exactly 65 minutes. It was a loooong 65 minutes too. I started timing my contractions and they went from coming every 6 minutes, to every 4 minutes to every 1-3 minutes. When we arrived at the hospital I made Daddy P stop at the main entrance, which was locked, and once out didn’t want to get back in the car to drive the very short distance to the emergency entrance. Daddy P convinced me and dropped me off. I was pre registered so had no paperwork to complete, and after asking if they had someone IN the hospital to do epidurals, immediately went back to L&D.

My first question at L&D was about getting an epidural. I think I said something like I don’t know if I’m in labor, but even if I’m not can I please have an epidural. My contractions were coming about 1 minute apart at this point and I had to change my clothes, get into the bed and get checked. The nurse checked me and was surprised to find I was 7 cm! This was a shock to Daddy P and I as well as the nurse. I asked her to make sure to let Dr. Love & the epidural man know. They started an iv and were squeezing fluid into me and moved me to a L&D room. I was only in there a short time before the man came to put my epidural in. Getting the epi was an adventure. You have to round & relax your shoulders and bend over your stomach to get an epidural and doing that while contractions are coming every one minute and lasting a minute is more than difficult. I promised I would hold still no matter what to get that epidural and I was able to make it through. After my epidural was in, but before it had taken effect the nurse checked me and found I was 9. Dr. Love came in & broke my water and then, checked me. His next words shocked everyone in the room, “I think I feel toes.”

He talked with Daddy P and I about how he felt it would be best to do a C-Section and Daddy P and I agreed—all we wanted was our boy here safely. We were scared and shocked and processing the news when I started to get a strange sensation. My epidural hadn’t numbed me completely and I told the nurse I couldn’t tell if I had gone the bathroom or if I already had a catheter in, but that I was feeling something very strange. She examined me, and then asked Daddy P to press the call button….her next words were very frightening…”We have a foot!”

Bro’s foot had emerged from my body, placing him in great danger. They informed Dr. Love and rushed me back to the OR. Things get blurry for me here. The OR got very busy and I was very scared for my boy. It was great that I had been asking for an epidural and that they had given me one (they don’t normally when a mother is that far along) because otherwise I would have had to been put to sleep. They numbed me up even more and Dr. Love got to work delivering brother. It took a little while because they had to pull his feet back up into my body. One had completely emerged and one was lodged in the birth canal. Brother was born at 2:11am, cried briefly and then went to the nurses. He had a tough time getting started breathing and needed a CPAP to put some pressure on his lungs. I got to see him an hour after he was born while we were still in the operating room. All through our hospital stay people kept coming in to see the “footling” baby—only 1% of babies are footling and those that are don’t have good survival statistics. I think that “Puppa” (Kenny”) was Bro’s guardian angel .